Facebook has come to change the lives of many. For some it is a great directory that has facilitated meetings with the people of our past and, sometimes, encounters with the people of our present.
Many relationships have ended like this
Either way, it seems that being “connected” is rewarding. It helps us feel that we are not alone in the world, to deal with time and boredom.
Many have met their partners through social media, others use this medium to have friends. It’s also common to hear that chatting with acquaintances has created problems in marriages.
Patients initially consult for jealousy prompted by the encounter of a message in their partner’s chat, Facebook or email.
It is these expressions and ways of communicating that arouse jealousy and conflict. Thus, a “like” in a photo, a comment can become a source of discord, because it is flirted by Twitter, is conquered and seduced by chat.
It’s also good to turn off from time to time to return to the “face to face” relationship, because real life is very different from what we see on Facebook. For some people to see what is happening with their contacts, to know about the life of their ex-partners, becomes an obsession and a torment.
For some it is easier to express feelings through an emoticon but when there is someone standing in front of us we realize the consequences. Behind the screens it’s a little harder to see those consequences of our actions.
To build, not to break
One of these consequences is the danger that some relationships will end. The word Facebook was included in more than a third of divorce applications last year, according to a survey conducted by the Wall Street Journal. I have identified the dangers of becoming intiqueous in anonymity, the obsession that leads one of the couple’s even to violate the security of mail keys, cell phones and chats.
When people spend a lot of time on social networking sites, they start to feel like they really know and be friends with people, even though they’re not really. When we are absorbed by screens, I always recommend a proximity plan, whether they live better the encounters that are beyond social networks, based on experiences, time and shared stories.
Psychology has seen that when people share intimate details, it’s because they’re looking for help or attention. In the last year I have seen dozens of relationships destroyed by what I call “Pearls of Facebook”: encounters with the past of leaving a relationship broken in pieces.
On Facebook, with friends like these, who needs enemies?
Facebook’s instant gratification stimulates the brain’s reward centers and it’s easy to find yourself in the desire for the success of a connection. Even the mind goes full throttle and imagines it to be the person and the perfect relationship.
Soon, someone can believe or feel that an online friend knows, understands or accepts him more than his partner, and this artificial sense of intimacy can begin to consume his thoughts, which becomes something even more exciting, because it is a secret. If this is happening to you it’s time to go back to the “face to face”, and don’t hesitate to disconnect or eliminate the cause of all your problems.
By: Katiuska Vera
482 1227 Bogota
June 26, 2019