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How to talk with your children about a divorce

Business, English - October 19, 2019
Image 1. How to talk with your children about a divorce

One of the words that so many children hate to say is “Mom and Dad are divorcing”. However, the reality is sad – almost 50% of married couples in the United States are getting divorced. This statistic is pretty much the same in other countries. And the worst part about this situation is the fact that many of these couples have a child or more. That factor makes divorce a whole different experience. Moreover, it makes everything much more difficult for both sides. And that does not only mean that the parents have to do much more paperwork and various physical stuff. They also have to talk to their kids about the breaking up. As much as it has to be informative, it also needs to be easy on the kid. If you are not able to bring the fact up for the child, you will see that it is extremely hard to deal with that for them. If you are willing to do everything in the best possible way, make sure to check out some of the advice in this article. It is here to help you out with some tricks that are going to make your life easier, as well as your child’s.

1. Do it together

One of the worst things that you can do for your kid is splitting up at all. That means that they would have to stay mostly with just one parent. Whatever your choice is, make sure that you are telling your child everything together. It does not matter if you have some unfinished business between you and your spouse. At this point, you have nothing that you have to worry about the most. That is your child. The more you will try to make it easier on them, the better your divorce will go. Therefore, once you have decided to tell them about breaking up, make sure that you are doing that together with your ex. This way, the child is going to see that you are still together for them. Also, they will see that they are taken care of. To add to that, the kid will see that you have the same reason. That will leave them with less confusion. That means that it will be easier for them to love both parents equally, as they will see no villain in this case. If, for some reason, you are not able to deal with this on your own, make sure to use a Washington divorce online service. It would save you some time with your papers, while you will be able to work on the children.

2. Try to keep the child away from the process

Divorcing is hard. And everyone knows that. However, it is as hard for your child. Maybe, it is even harder for them, as they are not able to understand everything that is going on. Therefore, if you are looking for a healthy divorce, make sure that you are not sparing the details of the divorce to the kid. If they can read, make sure that the papers are hidden and they are not able to find out some info. This way you are going to make them think of it a little less. Also, if any things come from outside because of the divorce (like evaluation process), make sure that the kid is not involved in that. Sure, after they are older, make sure to give them as many details as they need, but at the point when they are young, make sure to keep them away from everything.

3. Do not blame your ex

The worst thing that you can do is blaming your ex-spouse for something. Sure, they might not be the best person to live with. However, they are still a parent for your child. Therefore, you have to only support the kid by telling only the facts. They are going to make all of the decisions on their own. And by badmouthing someone, you might become a villain in the eyes of your child too. Therefore, try to only operate the facts, as that is the easiest thing to deal with for a young person like your kid is. Also, do not forget that you want to be a good parent, meaning that you have to make sure that you have nothing that you can be blamed for. It is best to simply make sure that you are living a better life than before the divorce.